All of us see our ‘friends’ on facebook (let’s face it, we also do it sometimes), putting up their most beautiful photos, in their happiest moments, with their best friends and loved ones.

You have a friend who you consider as attractive. She took a beautiful photo of herself with a random background. You look at it and say, ‘nice’.

After some hours, And then you see another photo of her with more or less the same pose, maybe she is wearing a different dress this time. But you can’t say, the camera is too close to her face.

And then another one with the exact same figure, this time she is in the office I guess, or is she? I can’t tell!

Again on your news feed. Well this is getting boring.

Another one, omg this time with the duck face!

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We are all human beings, and we all have this obsessive need of promoting our lives, proving to people that we work in the best jobs(look at the cheesecake that we prepared at the office!), that we married the best person (omg baby I love you so much for this present, you are my everything!), that we have the most gifted children (look at my child learning how to play the guitar, even though he is only hitting the strings and making terrible noise), that we are taking part in the best social occasions (look at us, having so much fun in this overpriced club, where we all are assembled around a tiny table, with the music so loud that we cannot hear each other). We all want to prove that we are the best, and we want people to see it.

Human beings were always this way, it is just with the social media now, we see it more clearly. So let’s not blame the social media for this. We can, for example (just from the top of my head) blame the neo-liberal capitalistic societal structure that pushes people to work as slaves, get underpaid, to pursue happiness in buying things  they do not need, to show off to people that they do not like. We are losing some core fundamental human values.

But this is not the point of my blog.

The point of this article is to illustrate the misconception and the superficiality that the social media offers to people, which sucks these people into an endless abyss where they want to promote all they have. If a girl is beautiful and nothing else, all she does is to take endless photos of her. If a guy has an expensive car, all you see in his facebook feed are the photos of his car from different angles.

Firstly, you can do better than that. You can use the social media as a tool to share information with people and collect feedback and experiences. Say you are a writer, share your blog. Say you are studying cinema, share the last documentary you shot. If you are good at nothing, share a nice quote, share a nice article you read, share the latest news.

Secondly (and finally coming to the main point of this blog), people are not stupid anymore, they know that the things you share, the happiest moments with your family, your most beautiful photo, the coolest party you have ever been is nothing but window dressing. Everybody knows that this is one of the few split seconds in your life where you have done something cool, or you are just showing something regular as something cool. There is no problem with doing that, but as I said, people understand, basically because if such things were normal occasions for you, you wouldn’t die promoting them. Saying ‘Hey look at me I am doing something cool!’ simply shows how sad your life is. Because let’s face it, we all go to shitty places, we all have ugly moments, and we all have nasty arguments with our family. The only difference is, we do not post them on Instagram.

As an example:

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This is a rather professional picture of mine, where I look considerably more attractive than my average state. This is because I put effort on the photography, and posed specifically for this picture. Most importantly, I spent time and tried until I had the best shot.

But,

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This is a photo that I just took, as the everyday me. This is not a photo that I would like to put on Instragram and definitely not likely to make it into the cover page of Vogue. But the truth is, I do not look like the first photo every day, I look like in THIS photo everyday.

So there is no point in me trying to put my most handsome photos all the time, only contributing to creating this ‘utopic’ modelling in our society. Because I know I do not look like that all the time, and everybody knows that too.

I write this post because I find this concept of ‘self promoting’ extremely shallow. When someone tries to compensate what they don’t have with overpublishing what they DO have, it looks ridiculous(ex: a girl taking 100 selfies of her, basically all photos being the same).

What is even more ridiculous is when people try to ‘self promote’ their lives by compensating what they do not have in their lives, by window dressing and exaggerating what they PRETEND to have(ex: Taking a photo of your girlfriends birthday gift and putting it on instagram, thanking her there).

I believe in the usage of social media and I understand the basic human instinct to be liked. I also do am happy when people press the ‘like’ button on my shares.

But there is a thin line, between sharing, getting experiences, and over promoting your life by poking it in peoples eyes, invading both their and your own privacy.

If we understand this thin line better, than social media will be a better place.